What is badminton for? -Part 1/.

The Badboiiz Badminton Club Christmas Essay 2010

What is Badminton For?

by Alan Parham

(Warning: this essay contains explicit references to the practice of self- abuse that some may find offensive)

It is with great pleasure that I write the inaugural Badminton Club (Badboiiz) Christmas Essay, and I am grateful to the members of the nominations and cultural sub-committee, for their choice of Moi.
What is Badminton for? This is the theme I wish to discuss this year. The obvious answer would be to “play badminton”. The playing of badminton is however, not straight forward. Let me explain.

The game can be described both scientifically and culturally. Scientifically, the game is a kinetic activity whereupon the shuttlecock is struck with force and direction in such a way to avoid it’s return by the opposing players, but also to place it within an agreed code of a legal area in which the shuttle lands to effect the cultural phenomenon of a ‘point‘.


This requires skill, dexterity, bodily movement and a type of wielding of the racquet to effect the desired placement of the shuttlecock. Driving the shuttle to and fro across the net, the players enter into a sacred state of consciousness, described as the ‘rally’ when won is ecstasy when lost is misery. This gives the game its charm and excitement.

Individual players having varying ability to do this. There is therefore an unspoken league table of players from hopeless to heavenly with all degrees of attainment in-between.

Naturally the players strive to win the game. The game ends when the winning team acquires a designated number of points first. The vanquished team is expected to show great magnanimity by offering to shake hands with their victors. Normally the two players (in doubles of course) shake hands with each other, then approach the net to shake hands with their respective opponents. Occasionally one or other player on the losing side may ‘make to shake’, only to suddenly withdraw their hand and make a lunge at their opponents’ crown jewels.